Social Justice

Our Theo professor asked us to make a reaction/realization paper regarding what we learned in our previous topic which was "Social Justice". Kinda weird but I first typed it here, I guess words flow more naturally for me here when I blog. So here goes my essay:

Social justice. Justice in general is something that we all seek. Whether it be for others or for ourselves. Everyday we see different people in different places, we all want the same thing, CHANGE. Being able to have the actual power to make that chance is a pretty big responsibility that alot are given but very few actually take advantage of that. I, try to do my part as best as I can. I save up, donate some of my savings to a charity and feel like, "There I've done my part somehow." But still seeing the mess reminds of how screwed up life is and how much attention it actually needs.

Being able to discuss the importance of social justice in theology further enlightens us on how much work we need to put into to save our world. I already got to watch the film by Joey Velasco (may he R.I.P) when I was around 4th year high school and getting to watch the film reminds you of how lucky you actually are to have objects in your life that most of the time you incessantly whine about. You slowly realize that you're a part of something bigger than yourself. We were all made in this world for a special purpose or maybe even special purposes, to atleast fulfill part of those purposes as to help those who actually need it. I mean who are we to complain about not eating at the right time or not getting the gadget we wanted for our birthday, when someone out there would feel lucky enough to get 2 cans of sardines on their dining table which they feel is enough to feed their family. I know that I complain alot, I'm not perfect and neither is the world. But I will help make a difference in this world because I know I can.

Painting above is by Joey Velasco I believe it's entitled "Hapag ng Pag-asa". Sorry but correct me if I'm wrong.

Random Thought

We've all got problems. When I was a kid I thought it was ok to just run away from them. Thinking that they won't bother, so I just let other people deal with it. Mostly those other people are my parents. But as you grow up sometimes people forget to tell you you have to deal with most things yourself and you figure that out all by yourself too.

Now, problems to me are complicated. Too hazy to even comprehend. Problems are everywhere. Every morning we see them, in the news, in magazines, at school, at work etc. They're inescapable. Solve one problem something else comes up.

I'm not trying to be a bitch here and be all pessimistic. I'm just being realistic and saying what I see right now in this world. I know for sure that this isn't the alcohol talking because I'm not drunk and the amount of vodka I drank a few moments ago won't equal to that of me doing and saying crazy things.

Anyway, don't get me wrong, I love life. But sometimes when you actually think about life at this time things just come in retrospect. You contemplate more and you think of things you've never even thought of before. Life has both positive and negative effects. We still need to keep on mind that everyday is a gift and that every moment may be sign for us to just think and reflect about where we are now.

Happy Birthday tito Babit:)

Today's my godfather/ninong's birthday, well okay here in the Philippines it was yesterday and in LA where my ninong is his birthday i think was yesterday. Ok enough of the time zone thing. I didn't get to make a blogpost yesterday cause I was really sick and and I couldn't think well.

So here it is, my uncle basically became my uncle cause he's my dad's brother. I only met him about December last year. Yes, only last year. My family and I visited him in the States and we stayed there for almost a month. I actually kind of got close to him. He was really cool and he doesn't really look like his age, i think he's almost 50, shhhh, don't tell. LOL.

Anyway my family here in the Philippines misses him. He's practically my idol when it comes to studies and he's pretty rad. I love every single one of my family members and I always wish for their happiness. Isn't it cool that I have a whole blog dedicated to him. IDK if he'll be able to read this though.

Happy birthday tito Babit. We love you so so much. We hope to go back there and visit you again in the states.

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MOTHERF*CKER

Excuse the title. I'm feeling rather angry today.

Today's my sister's birthday. I don't have a lot of homework. Just have a quiz to study for but it's an essay and I know I can write my way out of essays.

I've been feeling a bit angry and frustrated these past few weeks. Friends are supposed to be your stress reliever. Your part of actual peace in your life. I haven't really been feeling that vibe with my other friends. I'm not backstabbing or anything. It's just that I'm tired of this. I've been tired because of all this drama that I feel like most of us have been dragged into.

I'm not used to drama. There is drama in my life but I don't deal with it to this extent, most of the time I just either laugh it off or just not give a damn anymore. That's how I feel numb sometimes. Call me heartless but I'm just tired of this. Helping people who actually don't need it drains the energy out of you. Because it leaves you feeling disappointed and last night I just kept on texting swear words to my friend. That shows how angry I was.

I'm trying to be a good sport here and I try to keep playing the game. But isn't life a friggin team sport?. How can you play when the other members won't cooperate?

The other thing is, I'M FVCKING TIRED OF BEING CALLED A BOYFRIEND STEALER. My mom warned me about this. Being too close to guys who are already taken, I told her that their girlfriends know that I'm just a friend. And she told me to make sure of that.

I guess I was wrong on that part. This is probably the 4th time I've been thought of as a boyfriend stealer. I know my boundaries. I've been cheated on and I know that it isn't pretty. It hurts like hell, so why the heck would I try and steal other people's boyfriends when I know it won't do any good to me. I swear that I lay my line between friendship and romance and I sure as hell make sure that I don't cross it. Right now to be honest I feel offended and it makes me look a slut.

Maybe these girls don't realize it but they feel like they're the only one's being hurt. I'm hurt even more. I have feelings too. I've gone through a rocky relationship and somehow that's taught me something. These girls should realize that I've gone through enough to know what I should and shouldn't do and stop feeling to fvcking insecure. I swear I just want the whole world to...

We'll be going to Sn'R later. I'll be expecting a huge slice of pizza when I get there. That'll be one source of relief for today.

Urgh....

I get sudden hits of depression sometimes. I know, weird. I just get all fvcking sad and get all emo. It's not like I'm bipolar or anything. It's just that my mood swings are pretty freaky. I think I'm depressed now cause tomorrow's a Thursday. I don't know anyone from my Thursday classes.

AS IN 0. ZILCH

People keep on staring at me. It's awkward. I hate people staring at me. Especially if I don't know them. I know that my look doesn't really give of "Ms. Friendly". Even my good friends say that their first impression of me was stand-offish. For short I kinda look like a bitch. Which I admit doesn't really win over alot of friends at first. Which is why some people seek my friends opinions on who I really am. I'm one of the nicest and friendliest people that you will ever meet. I swear. I guess I give off a tough exterior cause of the pain I've felt my whole life.

I MUST REMIND MYSELF TO....

People say I have a really nice smile. I smile alot. But only when I'm with my friends and family.But nonetheless, I must stay positive!. Must continue to be optimistic!. Must not let these things get in the way. Must read my assignment for tomorrow's bio class!

Ooh College..

The 1st week of classes was crazy and stressful. In my MWF classes I know at least 3 people in each of my classes. But when it came to my TTh classes I only knew like 2 people and that's only in one class. It's hard to feel lonely when you're in a room with a bunch of people who know each other. And with my Journalism lanyard I stick out like a sore thumb all cause I only have one class in a Journalism section. I vow to make friends in my TTh classes so that I wouldn't feel awkward this whole semester.

Assignments for the weekend: My RC(Rizal Course) professor gave us some books to read on for the weekend. Tried searching for them in the library after my class last Friday, no luck. Someone must've checked them out. I decided to try and look for them at National Bookstore, though I'd but them instead. Only found one of the books. Still reading it, page 1-20. Pretty interesting book, but I find it long and winding.

Then we have this assignment for Computer class. Search for some abbreviated words.

I'm already on my 2nd year of college and I, like all people are having a hard time. This is only my 1st week and I feel so stressed out. The sched I made would slowly kill me. No breaks on MWF. Though I made a 3 hr break for myself in my TTh sched. Hoping that everything would work out alright this semester.

Good thing I'll get to see my high school friends tomorrow. I'm sure that'll cheer me up:)

Newswriting Here I Come

I've been stressing over my major subject for 2 friggin weeks now. It's a pre requisite of all our other major subjects. The thing is the hardest subjects to actually get are the 1st year ones. They don't give out the 1st year subjects until like the last minute when classes actually friggin' start.

The full load is 24 units composed of 8 subjects. 2 weeks ago was the encoding of subjects for irregulars. Since I had no choice I had 2nd year subjects encoded. But I left out one space for my major, praying and hoping that I would get it if God let me. A lot of us needed that major subject badly. We kept on being persistent little creeps, but still they kept on telling us to leave our names in the list. The friggin list doesn't do anything. They either lose it or just don't mind it at all.

So this Monday was our enrollment, tried seeing if we could get the 1st year subjects already. They said we should wait tomorrow. I already enrolled and just said that I'd add the subject I needed next time. Tuesday came, still nothing, on Wednesday pa daw. The day when classes start. Dandy right?.

I prayed so hard last night. I even told myself stuff like, "I will get that slot. I will get into Newswriting." So I came to the dean's office at 7 in the morning. Waited for about 30 mins til they asked us to go downstairs for encoding again of subjects.

I was told that only special subjects were offered for encoding. And my major wasn't one of them. Still I was persistent. I listed my major subject in the form, my friend saw it and told me that it wasn't offered. I said I would still try no matter what. That's how bad I needed and wanted that slot.

And thank God my persistence paid of, I GOT THE MAJOR SUBJECT. Which is Newswriting. And can I say "PHEW". Well I missed my first subject this morning just to enroll for my major subject but at least it was for a good cause.

Thank you Lord and I swear I will really try to rock this semester. My grades last sem were high. But I really want to go for all 1 this time:)

I Am Everyday People

After so many months I've only watched the indie movie the runaways this afternoon. I loved it actually. I'm very into indie movies. Most especially the fact that it's about rock legends the Runaways.

I enjoyed watching the movie and it made me miss just basically leaning back and rocking to a good old classic album. So I decided to download the album "Fit To Be Tied". I've been listening to it for 3 hours now. I feel refreshed, empowered and I feel like myself.

Somehow there's this sense in me that says that I lost myself or just basically I lost some of my personality. Listening to this album actually made me relax and let go. Maybe if you listen to it you'd feel so out of your wits cause of how loud it is. I'm inspired to write songs again, it's been about a year since I've written my last song. And I wrote my last song cause I was asked to and cause I was paid for it.

I miss that feeling of inspiration to write things on the spot. To just have a line constantly run through your mind, waiting for that zing of ideas. I'm a writer and an artist. This is what I live for. I thought I lost that spirit. But I know now it's coming back. Slowly but at least it's coming back.

Thank you Joan Jett and thank you music. You inspired me.