Sunday, February 20, 2011

Not Just Anybody

Ugh. for these past 3 weeks I've been eating nonstop. To be honest I've gained about 5-10 lbs I think. I'm starting to get worried, well not because I'm obsessing over my figure, it's just that, probably about once in 3 months my mood suddenly fluctuates and I become all melancholy for no reason. It's almost like I feel that my life is over and that there's this black hole in my soul.

I used to watch tv shows to get me all fine and shiz but that isn't working. Now I think I'm dealing with that through eating alot. It's like there's this emptiness that could only be filled by eating. I know it's sad. I've seriously looked into depression on the internet and I'm starting to believe that it is depression. What makes me suffer from this, hell I don't know. I mean I eat even when I'm not hungry. Maybe I need to check myself in with a psychiatrist but I'm just too scared that they'd say I've gone bonkers or something.

All I know is with writing about it here on my blog without being judged by family or friends who don't understand me makes me somewhat feel better.

I've been too lazy to attend some of my classes, this isn't good for me. Usually I would go into class no matter what. But now I seriously don't feel like myself.

Maybe it's pressure. Maybe it's stress. I'm praying so hard to help me get through this.

If you will leave comments for this blog I hope it's not rude. I seriously don't need those right now. I want to be able to go through this without any harsh judgement.

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